‘Every year that goes by becomes harder’; 30 years since Sherri McLaughlin’s disappearance

KAMLOOPS — “After 30 years of having to live through this, you would think I would be able to explain how I feel. But every year that goes by becomes harder and more complicated to explain,” said James McLaughlin.

It’s been three decades since McLaughlin last saw his sister Sherri, who was 20 years old at the time of her disappearance in Kamloops back in September of 1993.

“I don’t know myself any longer. I don’t know how to act around people. The simple question that people ask me, ‘How are you?’ is a trick question to me. Well, do you want me to answer honestly or this made up automatic response that means absolutely nothing?” James told CFJC Today Tuesday (Sept. 26).

In recent years, James has begun to publicly speak out about his depression, and coming to terms with the fact he may never receive closure.

“I don’t know who I am. I put my life on the back-burner for so long,” said James. “And have kept myself at a distance from everybody. I’ve pushed family and friends away. Kind of accepting the fact that now I’ll never know. I’ll definitely never know if the police don’t do their job.”

In 2009, Staff Sgt. Garry Kerr told assembled media and McLaughlin’s family that he believed he knew who was behind Sherri’s disappearance.

“You know who you are. I know who you are. What I’m asking is if there is a grain of humanity in you — and I know there is — please do the right thing and tell someone,” said Kerr in 2009.

Now retired from the force, the 30-year-old case still runs through the mind of Kerr.

“You never forget,” Kerr told CFJC News. “One of the reason would be that has never been a conclusion to it. I hate that word ‘closure,’ but there is still a hurting family and friends that should have had answers a long time ago.”

The man that both Kerr and James believe is responsible is Daniel Dow, who remains behind bars to this day on separate charges.

“At that time (back in 2009), we were an inch shy of a mile from laying charges. In my opinion, in my heart I know who’s responsible, but again that’s my opinion, and that person has chosen to never speak about it,” said Kerr.

James has called for justice reforms to ensure nobody else goes through the pain he has suffered over the past 30 years. After so many years, he said it’s become more difficult to find out information on the case.

“It’s a matter that realizing I’m not getting the support I should be from a government entity. They claim they know where this guy is, what prison he’s sitting in, but they fail to make an attempt to question this guy and get any real answers,” stated James.

While James himself says he’s come to that realization, he still holds out hope Sherri’s son may eventually have the chance to say goodbye.

“Maybe my nephew will find out what happened to his (mother) before he dies,” said James.